Does this Haircut Make Me Look Thinner?

"On second thought, let's just put it all back." 

You're Welcome, World

"This would have looked much worse if we were thinner."

Cat in a Box

"How about springing for a bigger box next time?"

Hermetically Sealed

"I'm not eating anything, I'm keeping the cookies fresh." 

Stop Judging Me!

"I'm not fat, I'm just fluffy. Oh, and I'm an alien."

What's More Inappropriate?

OR

Raise Your Hand If You Want Ice Cream?

"I"ll take two scoops!"