Does this Haircut Make Me Look Thinner?

"On second thought, let's just put it all back." 

You're Welcome, World

"This would have looked much worse if we were thinner."

Cat in a Box

"How about springing for a bigger box next time?"

Hermetically Sealed

"I'm not eating anything, I'm keeping the cookies fresh." 

Stop Judging Me!

"I'm not fat, I'm just fluffy. Oh, and I'm an alien."

What's More Inappropriate?

OR

Raise Your Hand If You Want Ice Cream?

"I"ll take two scoops!"

Deep Thoughts...

"Is it better to be happy or content?"

This is Not My Happy Face

"One more step and your leather chair gets it." 

Pot Belly?

"What pot belly?"

Bad Day at Strip Poker

"For your sake, I hope I lose this next hand. Come to mama..."

Gulp!

"Uh, yeah. I just ate my neck." 

I'm Wearing a Catigan

"I'm not sure why you need to keep this house so cold. You're only 85."

The Cat Makes the Clothes

"Does it? Tell me the truth."

Do You Swear to Tell the Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth?

We do. 

Okay, you can put your hands down. 

Are We Seeing a Pattern?

"I was thin when they brought me to the vet. Must be something in the water."

Is this a Cat or an Ewok?

"Buuuuuuurp. Thank you nurse. Most kind of you. Uh, you can put me down now."

I'm Not Your Play Thing

"I hope your cheap, plastic chair can hold the both of us. And btw, stop looking at me that way. You're creeping me out."

My Cat is Fat and I Like I-i-i-t

All I Want for Christmas is...